Change With Change


Words: Dr Rajgopal NIDAMBOOR

Change is a given. It is difficult to live if we don’t accept change. More so, because change is a constant. Change often comes to us without notice, or clue. But, it pays to be constantly prepared to deal with change… when change arrives… with change.

It is a timeless aphorism. It holds good for all seasons, and for all the good reasons.

“Nothing is constant except change,” is exactly what we are referring to.

The recent past has seen monumental changes. It has made our life, home, and office, experience change — ever so swiftly — and, at the familiar drop of an expression called ‘change.’

We need to accept change. This is not quite easy.

If you live with change and accept change, it’s fine. Otherwise, there is no need to worry — so long as you know what to do, or not do, in the face of change.

If not, there’s, again, nothing to worry.

Yes, you’d use the following ‘how-to,’ or handful of guidelines, with good effect, and adapt to change, on your own terms:

Maintain focus. When change appears in the face, you may often feel that your entire life has gone out of control. You may also feel that you just can’t get hold of things. Remember, it is only when we learn to accommodate change would we be able to manage, or conversely get ruffled by, change. Most transitions are not what they are made out to be — they are not always epic changes. How often do you remember a change that you have managed to deal with, or surmount? Besides, you will also recognise that some of the changes you once thought were complex are changes that have helped you to move along, and succeed, in life.

Re-evaluate your notions. When we are forced to adapt, or adjust, to change, we do not get over some basic assumptions, or beliefs, that we may hold dear. When we lose our job, for instance, it shatters the world around us. When someone lets us down, we feel a disgust for having ‘trusted’ people. When somebody insults us in the face without any valid reason whatsoever, it disheartens and hurts our feelings, including the faith we have in people who we thought were ‘open-minded.’ Isn’t this reason enough why expectations, or principles, don’t have continued, or lasting, worth? This is also reason enough why we need to re-evaluate them and stop them from being adverse — at any given point in time.

Seek direction. Speak to others outside your area of work and/or proficiency. They will not carry biases. Friends, or counsellors, are often the best people you may talk to. They can see the bigger image — not mere mounts. Remember, it is difficult to fine-tune and adapt to change without good guidance — because, one tends to keep moving from one point to the other. This ‘drift’ won’t help us in reaching the destination of acceptance of change; rather, it keeps us hovering away from the post.

Be flexible. Change calls for negotiation, co-operation and discussion. There is no way for us to accept change, if we resist. Rather, we need to be flexible. You need to bend a little, or more, to accept the change that comes with change. If you are rigid, you cannot bend to the winds of change, and the change they bring for us.

Don’t go overboard. When life gets dizzy and difficult, we tend to hold on firmly to our past experiences. We also quite easily get into the comfort zone, and try to manage things as they are. This leads to our losing control on certain things, which we had, till now, taken for granted. Take for instance, a team where associates get pulled in different directions. This may, at times, lead them to hold onto, or ‘tail,’ ‘distancing’ associates more strongly. The result is — heightened alienation. You get the point. Excessive control, or extreme functioning, to stop change doesn’t work. The best thing you can do is to sort out what you can control, or cannot control, and know what works best for you in a given, or not given, situation.

Go beyond your circumstances. You need to go beyond your circumstances to accept and thrive with change. When you accept the ‘fluidity’ in your situation, you will be able to better adapt to change, thanks to the inner strength you bring to your whole perspective. This is something that all spiritual practices teach us. This is contrary to popular belief — that spirituality is a diversion, or running away from one thing to another. It is not. It is, on the contrary, the unearthing of supplementary assets that provide us the strength in times of change and/or tough situations.

Anticipate the unanticipated. Change is an inevitable fact of life. It often comes when you least expect it. It is a necessity. It drives us to move towards progress and wholeness.

But, remember one thing: it is only when we hold on to certain changes, and not drop them, can we integrate and make life and its transitions less awkward, or troublesome. You get the point — the best thing to do is to be always prepared.

Why? Because, change may be lurking in the corner — at this instant.

Dr RAJGOPAL NIDAMBOOR, PhD, is a wellness physician-writer-editor, independent researcher, critic, columnist, author and publisher. His published work includes hundreds of newspaper, magazine, web articles, essays, meditations, columns, and critiques on a host of subjects, eight books on natural health, two coffee table tomes and an encyclopaedic treatise on Indian philosophy. He is Chief Wellness Officer, Docco360 — a mobile health application/platform connecting patients with Ayurveda, homeopathic and Unani physicians, and nutrition therapists, among others, from the comfort of their home — and, Editor-in-Chief, ThinkWellness360.

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