Anger ‘Rules’

Words: Dr Rajgopal NIDAMBOOR

Anger runs in our genes and also our emotions. Yet, it may not be as fierce as rage, belligerence and wrath. Anger can lead to violence, all right. But, it also has another face. It’s possible for us all to express and hold back anger, unlike rage, without becoming destructive. Rage is a state of demolition — it’s also ‘going out of control.’ It is a latent volcano, ready to erupt.

It is suggested that violence occurs when people go through a state of fear — losing their hold. It is also ironical that people filled with rage have a deep sense of humiliation, or umbrage, shame, repression and silence. It is like an oil burner, or self-fed venom, that spreads toxicity into one’s soul. The result is extended aggression and hatred. Hate, it is rightly said, destroys the soul. This is reason why we should do our best to conquer resentment, before it gets out of sync with us and our sense of emotional control.

Research suggests that certain processes play a key role in making us angry and calm. This is associated with timing, especially when an event has already happened. You’d call it self-control, or being calm in the wake of a storm. When you are filled with anger, your body goes into a state of alarm. It works overtime to produce a host of chemicals, hormones and muscle responses. You need to calm yourself when this occurs and take control of your anger in a healthy manner. Next, you would do well to accept anger as something that exists in your psyche. You should think of it as being damaging, because it depletes your natural energy levels and heightens negative directives. Remember, when your body reacts angrily, your mind becomes aloof to reason — it leaves your soul in low spirits. Is it not obvious that when you are in control of yourself, you are better able to prevent, or treat, situations going out of hand? This works like homeopathic medicine — ‘likes cure likes’ — using your anger to treat your own anger state.

All angry situations are wasted states. They are no resource; they can’t inspire, or motivate, us. Anger is a condition of misplaced energy — a proviso to losing our balance and purpose in life. It’s true ‘to get angry is human.’ This may, however, not always be acceptable. No unnatural, or excess, anger has the quality to be called humane. It’s also not an uplifting tool for the individual, or the community.

Anger is like adding fuel to the fire. It is a state that affixes heat and intensity in your anger to the point that you would not know who you are, or what you are. It may lead to rage. When rage conquers your mind, the outcome is invariably disastrous — violence at home, brutality in the neighbourhood, hostility wherever you look, or turn. Heightened rage, or fury, is the virus of terrorism, or distorted fundamentalism.

It is imperative for all of us to build our sense of awareness to beat anger in our own small, little ways — if not in a flash — effectively. This is more than half of the battle won — not lost — even before it has begun. Yet another simple trick you’d use is ‘never ever feed your anger.’ Try to identify the trigger and accept that you are human. When nothing works, strive to bend your anger, gently, by way of deliberate, deep breathing. Deep, slow, calming breaths help us to relax and reduce anger. It propels us to develop new insights, transform our expectations, or beliefs, and elevate our mind, body, and soul.

Dr RAJGOPAL NIDAMBOOR, PhD, is a wellness physician-writer-editor, independent researcher, critic, columnist, author and publisher. His published work includes hundreds of newspaper, magazine, web articles, essays, meditations, columns, and critiques on a host of subjects, eight books on natural health, two coffee table tomes and an encyclopaedic treatise on Indian philosophy. He is Chief Wellness Officer, Docco360 — a mobile health application/platform connecting patients with Ayurveda, homeopathic and Unani physicians, and nutrition therapists, among others, from the comfort of their home — and, Editor-in-Chief, ThinkWellness360.

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